Despite some strong doubts I had this week in the midst of finals, I finished my fifth semester of college yesterday. I now have less time to go in college than what's behind me. Over halfway done, people! Insanity. I feel old.
This semester was so incredible. I could try to think of other words to convey that to you, but I'd rather describe the incredulity of it all. Less than four months ago, I pulled up to my familiar dorm to meet some unfamiliar faces and start a new year. And on that day, I met two people who are now a lot more like sisters than anything else. On top of all that, I got to keep my favorite redheaded roommate from last year as a suitemate, and along with her roommate we formed a nice little group. Add to that my RA from last year and there you have my circle of friends from this semester. It was such a transition to go from spending all of my time with my best friend Emily and childhood friend Lindsey (who I'll hopefully be able to spend more time with next semester) to always being with another group of people. But life is full of transitions, and with crazy schedules and a generally busy semester for everyone, things happened like they did. I had plenty of time to get to know these wonderful people, and I am so thankful that God brought them into my life. This semester was admittedly not my strongest academically (not for a perfectionist, anyway), but I absolutely enjoyed it more than any other because of who I got to experience it with.
Now, we're three weeks from Christmas. And I have 6 weeks before I have to go back to school, which is crazy on its own. But I've got plenty of time to have fun, and that is what I'm going to try to do before diving into this next semester! Next week I'm headed to North Carolina with Kerry to stay with/spend time with Jessica and Holly. After that, it's wide open. But hopefully it will be a relaxing, enjoyable break.
God is teaching me so much about trusting Him. Let's be honest. It's not an easy thing. There are so many things about my life that the control freak in me freaks out about. Things like finding a job for next semester and what I need to do over the summer as either a job or internship. The truth is though, this is real life. Some things will always be up in the air, and when those things get figured out, there will be new things to face. We just have to remember that we're not in control. It's a terrifying and simultaneously freeing truth. Honestly, I'm so afraid of looking back in the years to come and feeling that I failed. I don't want to miss chances or opportunities and regret it later. I'm learning to take leaps of faith. I have to learn to step out on as many limbs as it takes, and to trust Him because He's got a view of the whole picture that I do not. The things that worry me today are things that He already has completely planned for me. His plans serve greater purposes than the goals I'm trying to achieve. Most importantly, He loves me and He WILL take care of me. It just takes a few more reminders some days than others.
All I know is that 8 or 9 months ago, I was a wreck. And somehow I pushed through it and God brought me through to where I am now, and blessed me so tremendously along the way with people that love me and are here to walk with me through it all. If I can just keep trusting Him, He will bring me through anything else that comes up.
I serve a wonderful God, and He is not finished growing me.
